How mothers perceive their own domestic violence

Journal of Child Custody

ISSN: 1537-9418 (Print) 1537-940X (Online) Journal homepage: http://www.tandfonline.com/loi/wjcc20

How mothers perceive their own domestic violence victimization and how it impacts their children Mukiba Stacy-Ann Louis & Emmanuel Janagan Johnson To cite this article: Mukiba Stacy-Ann Louis & Emmanuel Janagan Johnson (2017) How mothers perceive their own domestic violence victimization and how it impacts their children, Journal of Child Custody, 14:1, 34-48 To link to this article: http://dx.doi.org/10.1080/15379418.2017.1314206

Published online: 07 Jun 2017.

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Date: 07 June 2017, At: 08:54

JOURNAL OF CHILD CUSTODY 2017, VOL. 14, NO. 1, 34–48 https://doi.org/10.1080/15379418.2017.1314206

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How mothers perceive their own domestic violence victimization and how it impacts their children Mukiba Stacy-Ann Louis and Emmanuel Janagan Johnson Department of Behavioural Sciences, The University of the West Indies, St. Augustine, Trinidad ABSTRACT

KEYWORDS

Children’s exposure to domestic violence has been associated with various negative outcomes. This study explores the effects of children’s exposure to domestic violence through the lenses of the primary victims of abuse. Specifically, the consequences associated with their children’s exposure to domestic violence, the coping mechanisms employed, and identified preventative measures to address this social problem. Semistructured interviews were conducted to obtain the mother’s perspective. Participants for this study were randomly obtained from the database of the Legal Aid and Advisory Authority. Findings revealed that children are used as a bargaining tool by both mothers (to prevent DV) and perpetrators (to exert control). The coping mechanisms that mothers believed their children used included listening to music, adopting care taking roles, and positioning themselves away from the violence.

Abuse; coping mechanism; effects; exposure; incidents; prevention; victimization

Introduction Domestic violence is understood to involve an on-going pattern of coercive control (Stark, 2007). Carney and Merrell (2001) describe domestic violence as an escalating pattern of abuse where one partner in a relationship controls the other through force, intimidation, and/or threat of violence. When children are in the home, their exposure to domestic violence begins when a conflict arises between their parents or guardians. Their experience, however, is dependent on various factors including their age; personality; socioeconomic status; role in the family; the frequency, nature, and duration of their exposure; and their relationships with parents, siblings, and peers, among others (Hester, Pearson, & Harwin, 2000; Salcido, Weithorn, & Behrman, 1999). A child’s exposure to domestic violence has been associated with increased aggression (Holden, Stein, Richie, Harris, & Jouriles, 1998) and externalizing problems (McFarlane, Dixon, Lukens, & Lucksted, 2003), in addition to internalizing behavioral issues (Davies & Cummings, 1994). Although the CONTACT Emmanuel Janagan Johnson [email protected] Department of Behavioural Sciences, Faculty of Social Sciences, The University of the West Indies, St. Augustine Campus, St. Augustine, JMCAN19, Trinidad. Color versions of one or more of the figures in the article can be found online at www.tandfonline.com/wjcc. © 2017 Taylor & Francis

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abuse is not directly inflicted upon them, exposure to domestic violence between parents can have a physical, social, and psychological effect on a child’s wellbeing (Grantham-McGregor, Schofield, & Harris, 1983). In other words, children who are exposed to domestic violence between parents experience a wide range of difficulties such as low-self-esteem, poor social skills, academic challenges, and health concerns (Fantuzzo & Mohr, 1999; Margolin, Gordis, Medina, & Oliver, 2003). According to Garbarino, Kostelny, and Dubrow (1991) as well as Ney, Fung, and Wickett (1994), children who witness violence struggle with their self-perception and how they view their family; their ideas regarding their life’s purpose and significance; and their expectations regarding the future. According to the Domestic Violence Act of Trinidad & Tobago (1999) (as amended in 2006), “domestic violence” includes physical, sexual, emotional, psychological, or financial abuse committed by a person against a spouse, child, or any other person who is a dependent member of the household. However, for the purposes of this research, the term “domestic violence” was limited to the use of physical violence or threat to cause physical harm. Types of domestic violence

Domestic violence exists in many forms and can be inflicted upon victims in various ways. Common types of domestic violence include sexual abuse, physical abuse, and psychological abuse. Perpetrators often commit these acts in order to gain and maintain power and control over their victim (Cardarelli, 2000). Sexual abuse Domestic violence and sexual abuse are pervasive and life-threatening crimes, affecting millions of individuals across our nation regardless of age, economic status, race, religion, or education. Domestic violence and sexual abuse not only severely impact victims but our entire communities and are linked (Abrahams, 2010). According to World Health Organization (WHO, 2001), “sexual abuse is any sexual act, attempt to obtain a sexual act, unwanted sexual comments or advances, or acts to traffic, or otherwise directed, against a person’s sexuality using coercion, by any person regardless of their relationship to the victim, in any setting, including but not limited to home and work.” Physical abuse Physical abuse refers to behavior with the intention of causing pain and/or injury to another (Straus & Gelles, 1986). Such behavior includes slapping, pushing, scratching, beating, and strangulation. This type of abuse can lead to physical injury and in some cases death.

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M. S.-A. LOUIS AND E. J. JOHNSON

Psychological abuse The most common form of abuse is psychological abuse and it has been shown to have dire consequences on a victim’s mental health (Mechanic, Weaver, & Resick, 2008). It includes verbal and nonverbal behaviors committed with the intention of causing emotional harm or threat of harm to another (Jouriles, Murphy, & O’Leary, 1989; Straus, 1979). Shouting, humiliation, social isolation, using insults, and putting the victim down are some of the tactics employed by abusers (Hudson & McIntosh, 1981). Psychological abuse usually precedes, occurs alongside, or follows physical and sexual abuse (Koss et al., 1994). Furthermore, women consider it to be more harmful than physical abuse (Walker, 1984). Domestic violence in Trinidad & Tobago

The Trinidad & Tobago Population and Housing Census for the year 2011 revealed that the total female population amounted to 661,714 women. Therefore, women constituted 49.8% of the population of Trinidad, and females aged 18 years and over comprised 75% of the female population. In the year 2013, the murder rate of females aged 18 and over was 7 per 100,000. Murder of women also accounted for approximately 7% of all murders in Trinidad & Tobago (CAPA, 2014). Provisional figures from the Crime and Problem Analysis Unit (hereafter referred to as “CAPA”) of the Trinidad & Tobago Police Service (TTPS) indicate that for the period of January 1, 2004 to February 28, 2014, 15,312 reports of domestic violence were received (CAPA, 2014). The offenses ranged from psychological abuse to murder. However, most reports were for “assault by beating” and “threats,” which amounted to 7,404 and 4,871, respectively. The CAPA data also showed that, for the cases in which the offender was identified, the murders were most often committed by the victim’s partner (husband, common-law husband, ex-husband, fiancé, boyfriend, or ex–boyfriend). This amounted to 16.8% of all cases reported. Further investigation identified four main motives behind these murders: domestic violence (36%), robbery (17%), revenge (12%), and altercation (10%). Statistics on domestic violence in Trinidad & Tobago are currently scarce. However, in the year 2008, a national registry on domestic violence in Trinidad was created. Furthermore, there are other fragmented sources of data, such as data from Social Workers, the Magistrate’s Court of Trinidad & Tobago, NGO sectors, and the Crime and Problem Analysis Unit of the Trinidad & Tobago Police Service. Even in the absence of collective data, the sources of data identified above paint an alarming picture of violence against women in our country. In fact, a report prepared by the United Nations Development Fund for Women (UNIFEM) states that 30% of the women surveyed in Trinidad & Tobago have experienced domestic violence in some form (UNIFEM, 2014).


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Objectives

This study focused on two major areas: mothers’ perspectives on the impact of their children’s exposure to domestic violence and the preventative strategies that can be implemented to address this issue. Importance of the study

In light of the increasing number of children exposed to domestic violence and its potentially dire consequences, it is imperative that society develops a better appreciation and understanding of this issue (Dalton, Drozd, & Wong, 2004). This is particularly essential in order to establish protective measures. In Trinidad & Tobago, some pro-active steps have been taken by both government and nongovernmental agencies to address issues of domestic violence as they relate to children. Some of the major developments include the passage of the Children’s Act 2012, as well as the development of the Children’s Authority, Families in Action (a volunteer organization), and the Victim and Witness Support Unit. This study provides insight into a mother’s perspective of the consequences associated with her children’s exposure to domestic violence. It is particularly useful given its potential to help promote greater awareness and develop pro-active methods of prevention and intervention. To effectively address this social problem, several questions must be explored: What are the experiences of mothers who are subjected to domestic violence in their children’s presence? Furthermore, do mothers believe that exposure to domestic violence has an adverse impact on their children? Methodology Sampling procedure

Domestic violence embodies a range of different forms of abusive behavior. It is for this reason that purposive sampling was utilized to select mothers who exhibit the characteristics under examination in the study (Devers & Frankel, 2000). According to Yegidis, Weinbach, and Myers (2012), studying a small number of mothers is suitable for in-depth qualitative data. In light of this, a sample size of 12 women who have been identified as primary victims of domestic violence were recruited from the Legal Aid database. Participants who have minor children ranging from ages 10 to 17 who have been exposed to domestic violence between parents were selected. Recruitment of participants

In order to recruit potential participants for this study, a permission letter was submitted to the Director Chairman of the Legal Aid and Advisory Authority,

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as this institution provides legal advice and representation to individuals. After permission was obtained, the researcher examined the Legal Aid database to select potential mothers for the study. A total of 35 potential participants were selected but only 12 agreed to participate. Potential participants were selected based on the following criteria: They sought Legal Aid assistance in relation to a matter of domestic violence; they were married or cohabiting with the abuser; and children were residing in the home and exposed to domestic violence. The potential participants were subsequently contacted by telephone and screened to determine their suitability to be interviewed for the study as well as their willingness to participate. Ethical consideration

In an effort to comply with ethical standards, a copy of the consent form and procedures for protecting participants was included in the letter sent to the Legal Aid and Advisory Authority. After approval was obtained, participants were selected and informed of their rights, the purpose of the study, and the manner in which their identity would be protected. Participants were also informed that the interviews were being tape-recorded and their consent was documented. All written and transcribed material generated from this research was treated as strictly confidential and securely stored and the tape recordings were erased. Limitations

There were several limitations to this study. First, the researcher encountered difficulties in obtaining the sample. This was because the majority of the participants’ identified contact numbers were inactive. Furthermore, due to the nature of the study, some mothers refused to engage in this research, as they did not want to revisit past experiences. As a result, the sample size is small and the findings are limited to this study. The utilization of semistructured interviews also proved to be a challenge, as some mothers were reluctant to provide in-depth information on certain issues was a common phenomenon, which was discussed in the study by Darlington and Scott (2002). There was also the possibility that they overlooked and/or minimized their observations in order to “save face.” Results The average age of participants in this study was 32 years. From the sample obtained, 66.6% were Afro-Trinidadians, 16.6% were Indo-Trinidadians, and 16.6% were Mixed-Trinidadians. All the participants were unmarried and/or cohabiting; and 66.6% were living with the perpetrator and children


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whilst 33.3% were living with the perpetrator, children, and in-laws. The length of their relationship with the perpetrator ranged from 6 to 12 years. A total of 83.3% had two children and the remainder had three children. All of the participants’ children were females with ages spanning from 13 to 16 years with the mean age being 14 years. The majority (83.3%) had a primary school education and 16.6% had no formal education. Two-thirds (66.6%) were unemployed and one-third (33.3%) were employed (selfemployed). All of the participants were of low socio-economic status, with an income ranging from 2000 to 5000 TTD per month (this is equivalent to 295.03 USD to 737.57 USD per month). Incidence of exposure to domestic violence

In the interviews conducted, there were two forms of domestic violence described: physical and verbal abuse. Some children were reportedly exposed to both forms of violence from as early as the age of four. As the children grew older, the abuse became more prevalent and they became more aware of their mothers’ victimization. The following Figure 1 depicts the type of abuse and frequency of children’s exposure. Figure 2 shows the manner in which children reportedly witnessed violence. In addition to their demographic profile, there were other influencing factors that contributed to the mothers’ perceptions of the impact that exposure had on their children. Some of these factors included lack of familial support, lack of motivation and encouragement by partner, and minimal or no interaction with others (isolation). Children being used as a bargaining chip

In the interviews, participants indicated that the presence of domestic violence caused severe tension in the home and to some extent affected the relationship between individuals in the household. They all reported that both they and the

Figure 1.

Type of abuse and frequency of children’s exposure to domestic violence.

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Figure 2.

Type of exposure to domestic violence.

perpetrator often used their children as bargaining chips either to prevent abuse or to exert control. One of the mothers stated: “When my husband was angry he would start an argument with me and he would become physically and verbally abusive towards me in the presence of our minor children.” In an effort to prevent the abuse, the participant stated that she would often plead with the abuser that “the children were downstairs and that [they] should go to their room to discuss his concerns.” In contrast, another mother expressed that her child would be used as a bargaining tool by the perpetrator in an effort to ensure that she complied with his requests. The participant stated: “He will place all of our child’s belongings on the streets and would not support our child financially if I do not do as he says.” In an effort to protect against these threats and to maintain peace in the home, she complied with his request. Several stated that whenever domestic violence was occurring in the home, their daughters would intervene by crying and pleading with the abuser to stop. One mother stated that her daughter would become “angry and enraged and would use obscenity towards the abuser; and [she] frequently informed [her mother] that she should not endure this set of bullshit and continuous disrespect.” On the other hand, another mother had a different experience and stated: Whenever my daughter saw the abuse, she would run upstairs and pull me along to lock ourselves in a room. However, he would always break down the door and begin abusing me even more. Our daughter would then try to call a family member to assist and whenever she tried to do so, he would threatened to kill me and our daughter would plead with him not to do it and simply hang up the phone. Unhealthy relationships and social isolation

Other mothers described the impact of their children’s exposure to domestic violence in terms of their social isolation and inability to develop healthy


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relationships. The majority expressed fear of the possibility of their children isolating themselves from family, peers, and friends because of shame and/ or lack of trust; engaging in relationships similar to what they have witnessed; and displaying a lack of confidence to socialize with others. One mother stated that while speaking to her teenage daughter about relationships and whether she would like to get married someday, the child’s response was, “Marriage, hmm, I don’t want no man at all, I prefer to stay by myself, I don’t think relationships are for me.” Ultimately, however, none of the participants stated that they have observed any behavior that would seriously suggest that their children are in an unhealthy relationship or are socially isolating themselves. They attributed this to the fact that their children were not involved in romantic relationships at the time and had many friends. The majority of participants (85%) stated that their children exhibited aggressive tendencies towards the perpetrator and others who they believed possessed similar characteristics and/or resembled him. One mother stated that when speaking with her child about the perpetrator’s behavior, she exclaimed that, “Her father was a coward, an old stinking pig who had no regard for his wife and children and would begin pelting items on the wall.” School performance

From the interviews conducted, all of the children who were exposed to domestic violence were adolescents between the ages of 13 and 16 years. The majority of mothers interviewed stated that their children showed a lack of motivation to attend school and encountered difficulties in processing information at school. One mother also shared that her child who is in secondary school was always an “A” student but she believes that the continued exposure to domestic violence and her child’s inability to adequately channel her emotions about it caused her to lose her motivation to pursue an education. Whereas another mother stated that she knows that her child is affected by what she sees and hears, but there has not been any significant effect on her school performance, as her grades have remained the same. One mother further remarked that children are in fact the “casualties” of domestic violence and her biggest concern was that her daughters would be subjected to the same and/or similar violent behavior. One remark of hers that stood out was that, “The worst possible thing would be to see my daughter… my beautiful daughter battered and abused and thinking that what she was experiencing was in fact love or her fault … ” In addition to this, the mothers described the manner in which their children react to the exposure of domestic violence in the home and the strategies that they observed their children utilize in order to cope. As a result, common themes were developed and the following table provides a breakdown of the children’s reactions and coping mechanisms employed.

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The majority of participants’ children reacted to exposure to domestic violence by trying to intervene and/or prevent the perpetrator from inflicting abuse. A smaller number (16.6%) would either lock themselves in the room, call for help, or provide emotional support for their mother. Other mothers stated that they observed that after they experienced abuse their daughters would adopt a very caring and nurturing role. One described a similar situation with her daughter who after witnessing domestic violence would ask, “Mummy are you ok, did daddy hurt you, mummy what can I do to make it better. Please don’t worry mummy, I will study and will get you anything … I love you ok.” In contrast, the minority of mothers interviewed stated that their children adopted a more dissociative conduct. One highlighted that whenever she attended parent-teacher meetings, teachers commended her on the wonderful family she has and stated she is doing an excellent job with her child. One of the things that stood out to this participant was when the teacher began describing their living environment as aiding the child’s development and one that her child cherishes immensely. The mother stated that she was extremely taken aback by the remarks and realized that her child was presenting a picture to her teachers and peers of the family life that she wanted but this life was not in fact her child’s reality. The information gathered revealed that the majority (33.3%) of participants were of the opinion that their children cope through disengagement and adopting care taking roles in the home. Whereas 16.6% stated that they observed that their children would position themselves away from the violence; and the same percentage would turn to using alcohol. Some mothers believed that the coping methods employed by their children were not helpful. One mother expressed that at times it appeared as though her daughter was so overwhelmed with the situation that she would simply withdraw from everything and ensured that she was not at home when the perpetrator was abusive.

Repetition of violent behavior

All participants interviewed expressed concern about the possibility that their children would repeat the behavior seen or be subjected to a similar form of abuse. One mother stated: He would continuously beat me in the presence of my 13 year old daughter and would inform my daughter that I needed to be disciplined. On several occasions he would give the belt to my minor child and tell her to inflict harm on me but my daughter would refuse and he would become even more abusive…

The data obtained also provided insight regarding preventative measures that mothers believed could be implemented to prevent exposure of children to domestic violence. Three common preventative methods were identified by


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participants: creating awareness about the dire consequences associated with children’s exposure to domestic violence; providing Safe Havens in schools; and relocating mothers and children while providing necessary support. Although they identified specific strategies that can be implemented, they believed that a holistic approach must be adopted to prevent the persistence of this social problem. Discussion Children’s experiences of domestic violence in the home may involve more than witnessing and/or directly experiencing violence and can include the abusers’ use of the child as a way to exert control (Edleson, 1999; Hester et al., 2000; Lapierre, 2010). In an effort to maintain control, the abuser may also seek to undermine the mother–child relationship (Hester et al., 2000). This is consistent with the findings of this research study. However, this study further revealed that mothers also use their children as bargaining chips in an effort to prevent the abuse. Research has shown that children who are exposed to domestic violence experience and/or encounter some challenges, although, not all are affected in the same way (Messiah & Johnson, 2017). The interviews conducted revealed that mothers believed their children had been impacted by their exposure to domestic violence. However, the extent to which they believed their children were affected differed. A common concern was the inherent possibility that such exposure can have a detrimental impact on their child’s mental and emotional wellbeing. Participants stated that with increased exposure, they observed changes in their children’s behavior and methods of communication. It is essential to note that all of the mothers interviewed for this study were still living in the abusive relationship. Therefore, their ability to accurately assess the impact of their children’s exposure to domestic violence may have been affected. Psychological impact

From the data gathered, it was evident that each participant perceived that their children exhibited signs of emotional and/or psychological difficulties due to their exposure to domestic violence. This is in line with current research and literature in this area. According to Bagshaw (2007), children who have been exposed to domestic violence exhibit negative outcomes, such as feelings of sadness, confusion, fear, and anger. An earlier study conducted by Carlson (1984) revealed that growing up in a violent home increases the likelihood of being abused. Furthermore, adolescent girls can develop extreme distrust in men and may express negative attitudes about marriage. This was evident in the findings of this research, although this effect was in the

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minority. Furthermore, adolescents rely heavily on outside influences as indicators of their own self-worth. As a result, many would likely not disclose their experiences at home, as if others found out, the shame would be devastating, further compounding their sense of sadness and vulnerability (Alexander, Macdonald, & Paton, 2005). The present findings are consistent with that of similar research on this topic. Empirical evidence suggests that growing up in homes where domestic violence is present can significantly impact a child’s development (Martin, 2002; McIntosh, 2002), which can contribute to the cycle of adversity and violence throughout adulthood (Cunningham & Baker, 2004). The on-going stress associated with children’s exposure to domestic violence has been associated with withdrawal behaviors, such as difficulty in school and delinquency (Senecal, 2002). A study by Herrenkohl, Sousa, Tajima, Herrenkohl, and Moylan (2008) further revealed that children exposed to domestic violence also have a tendency to drop out of school, become suicidal, and exhibit delinquent behavior. According to Humphreys, Houghton, and Ellis (2008), children affected by violence are more likely to experience higher rates of depression, as well as behavioral and cognitive problems. Studies conducted by Kitzman, Gaylord, Holt, and Kenny (2003), Bedi and Chris (2007), and Spilsbury et al. (2008), revealed that children are adversely impacted both socially and academically. A review by Edleson (1999) showed that children who were exposed to domestic violence exhibited signs of severe behavioral and emotional problems. Furthermore, when participants were asked about a change in their children’s behavior, the majority stated that they observed that their children were more aggressive, experienced mood and temperament problems, and had difficulties at school. It is also essential to note that exposure to domestic violence between parents will likely affect a child differently based on the child’s developmental stage. Developmental theorists have posited that although adolescents are affected by exposure to domestic violence, they possess the ability to cope by relying on external support such as friends, relatives, etc. School-age children (6–12 years) are involved in developing a more sophisticated emotional awareness of themselves and others, in particular of how the abuse is affecting their mothers (Daniel, Wassel, & Gilligan, 1999). In fact, according to Hester et al. (2000), as children get older they become more focused on trying to prevent the abuse. Coping mechanisms

According to Cunningham and Baker (2004) and Mullender et al. (2002), children invoke various methods to cope with stressful situations. In this study, mothers reported observing their children listening to music; adopting caretaking roles; positioning themselves away from the violence; and using alcohol. The latter behavior can be explained by theories of deviance, which


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suggest that when a person feels a sense of injustice they extend the legal norms to rationalize illegitimate ends. In other words, children who are exposed to domestic violence may seek to invoke another wrong to justify the wrong that they believe has been imposed on them. Preventative strategies

As stated earlier, mothers identified three preventative measures to address this issue: Relocating mothers and children with the necessary support; creating awareness about the dire consequences associated with children’s exposure to domestic violence; and provision of Safe Havens in schools. However, Lapierre (2010) suggested that the relocation of mothers and children alone does not preclude the continuation of violence even after separation from the perpetrator. Therefore, it is not enough to simply relocate, but this must be coupled with rehabilitation and support from relevant agencies that can help ensure the victims’ protection. Additionally, 30% of participants reported that creating awareness can assist in curbing this social problem. Research has shown that mothers remain in abusive relationships for various reasons. According to Levendosky et al. (2004), shame and/or guilt are some influencing factors for why women may choose to remain in an abusive relationship. It can also be attributed to the lack of social awareness and understanding regarding the issue (Matthews, 2004) as well as their desire to have their children raised in a household with both parents. Turner (2002) purports that mothers may choose to remain in such relationships because of fear of retaliation from the abuser. This is particularly the case if there is a history of threats of harm (Matthews, 2004). However, when the violence is directly inflicted on their children, mothers may choose to leave (Hadeed & Yeon-Shim, 2010). This suggests that they remain in such relationships for the benefit of their children. Therefore, if mothers were aware of how merely witnessing domestic violence can adversely impact their children; they may leave the relationship sooner. Conclusion It is evident that children who are exposed to domestic violence experience detrimental and long-standing effects. Depending on the situation, there are several influencing factors that would impact and/or mitigate a child’s response. This study sought to elucidate mothers’ perceptions of how their own experience of domestic violence impacted their children. Findings suggested that mothers believed the impact of domestic violence to be very high in their experiences. The study further revealed that children are used as bargaining chips by their mothers (victims) to reclaim some control and to prevent abuse. This

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provides insight that can inform the courts in their decision making process regarding family issues, such as divorce, custody, and protection orders. Acknowledgments The authors acknowledge all the participants in this study for sharing valuable information.

Ethical standards and informed consent All procedures followed were in accordance with the Ethical Standards of the Responsible Committee on Human Experimentation [institutional and national] and with the Helsinki Declaration of 1975, as revised in 2000. Informed consent was obtained from all individual participants included in the study.

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