Le Chevalier Noir - Yves Scherer

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Notre Dame des Fleurs. That you, sugar bumps? [turns around to see a man]. Who the hell are you? It's me, Sugar bumps. Gentlemen! Pourquoi cet air si ...
Le Chevalier Noir

Notre Dame des Fleurs That you, sugar bumps? [turns around to see a man] Who the hell are you? It‘s me, Sugar bumps.

Gentlemen! Pourquoi cet air si sérieux ? Let‘s broaden our minds. You fellas have said some pretty mean things. Some of which were true under that fiend, Sebastien. He was a thief, and a terrorist. On the other hand he had a tremendous singing voice. He‘s dead now, and he‘s left me in charge. Now, I can be theatrical, and maybe even a little rough - but one thing I am not, is a killer. I am an artist. Et quand on a du talent, on se doit d’en tirer profit. There is a portfolio strategy in place by investors and incubators that promotes a shotgun approach as opposed to the sniper rifle approach. What does this mean? It means that early stage funds, super angels, and micro VC’s are primarily interested in investing $50,000 a piece in hundreds of different startups instead of investing $4,000,000 a piece in a select few. The shotgun portfolio strategy speculates that a few startups will be successful, and will pay for all of the losers. If you ask me, this is bullocks. In general angels and VC‘s are wimps. Yes, that’s right: they have no cojones. If we want people like Sébastien, we have to get over our ideas about the way things must always be. But the burden of proof should not be on the entrepreneur to explain why he is breaking the dogma, it should be on the purveyors of the dogma to explain why he should use it. That‘s why I‘d like to introduce a new, a different approach to things tonight I call it the Fire Extinguisher strategy. How is the system that constitutes contemporary art - the relations between artists, viewers, institutions, biennales, art fairs, gallerists, critics, theorist - independent from localized cultural, social, political and economical circumstances? Is there a global art, one contemporary art now? Or how does the global art market parasite off of smaller, localized production as a source of inspiration and products to market a larger audience? Every net has its holes, holes that can be made wider, which in theory can cause the entire net to rupture. But being constrained by market conditions does not imply that we cannot reject them. On the contrary, my strategy advocates questioning market values precisely in the light of one’s own involvement. Instead of conceiving of “the market” as evil Other, I work from the premise that we are all, in different ways, bound up in specific ¿FPDUNHWFRQGLWLRQV&RQVHTXHQWO\WKHPDUNHWLVQRWXQGHUVWRRG as a reality detached from society. That much about the general concept. Now as an entrepreneur, I began to wonder, “Why hasn’t anyone proposed this already?” It’s a great idea, but… I can’t be the first person to think of it. In doing some research online I found out that other American inventors have had similar designs and proposals for a decade. However, none of them were able to get taken seriously or obtain funding. Why did that happen? I want to tell you my answer: Certain people are without logic. You cannot buy them, daunt them or negotiate with them. Certains hommes veulent juste voir le monde brûler. But the painter is condemned to please. By no means can he transform a painting into an object of aversion. The purpose of a scarecrow is to frighten birds from the field where it is planted, but the most terrifying painting is there to attract visitors. Actual torture can also be interesting, but in general that can’t be considered its purpose. Torture takes place for a variety of reasons. In principle its purpose differs little from that of the scarecrow: unlike art, it is offered to sight in order to repel us from the horror it puts on display. The painted torture, conversely, does not attempt to reform us. Art never takes on itself the work of the judge. It does not interest us in some horror for its own sake: that is not even imaginable. When horror is subject to the transfiguration of an authentic art, it becomes a pleasure, an intense pleasure, but a pleasure all the same. Therefore, it is one of the central assumptions of my theory that there is no strict separation between art and the market, but that they are mutually dependent while also retaining some degree of autonomy. Consequently, the balancing act performed by the artwork as commodity between price and pricelessness is considered as the matrix for the double game played by those who banish the market to an imaginary outside while at the same time constantly feeding it. This is what I call erotic art. In essence, the domain of erotic art or eroticism is the domain of violence, of violation... The most violent thing of all for us is death which jerks us out of a tenacious obsession with the lastingness of our discontinuous being. We cannot imagine the transition from one state to another one basically unlike it without picturing the violence done to the being called into existence through discontinuity. Not only do we find in the uneasy transitions of organisms engaged in reproduction the same basic violence which in physical eroticism leaves us gasping, but we also catch the inner meaning of that violence. What does physical eroticism signify if not a violation of the very being of its practitioners? — a violation bordering on death, bordering on murder. That reminds me - I‘m overrunning. Ladies and Gentlemen, there is only one question left to answer tonight. Do you want to become the fireman? Well, here‘s what you need to do: Fill the churches with dirty thoughts! Introduce honesty to the White House! Write letters in dead languages to people you‘ve never met! Paint filthy words on the foreheads of children! Rub other mans rhubarbs! Burn your credit cards and wear high heels! Asylum doors stand open! Fill the suburbs with murder and rape! Divine madness! Let there be ecstasy, ecstasy in the streets! Laugh and the world laughs with you! And when the smoke clears, there‘s some cream on top, and that’s your investment return.

A C ommon C old Quick question. When the clock strikes twelve, do I get a little kiss? Good morning! Ladies and Gentlemen, I must admit, this is sadly anti-climatic. But you know what I‘ve noticed? Nobody panics when things go „according to plan.“ Even if the plan is horrifying! If, tomorrow, I tell the press that, like, a gang banger will get shot, or a truckload of soldiers will be blown up, nobody panics, because it‘s all „part of the plan“. What‘s happening? I know I‘d want to know just what the hell is going on if I were you. And I‘d like to bet you have no idea what you dealing with, I bet double or nothing, batman could crawl out of that shallow grave and hunt you down like the dogs you all are. Let‘s start together then. Let me guide you through the toxic clime of chumminess. Smoking is bad. Chances are, you’re already aware of this fact. If you’ve spent time in the civilized world, you’ve doubtless seen at least one billboard, TV commercial, or warning label announcing this very fact. The reasons are obvious, of course; cigarette smoking is known to cause lung cancer, birth defects and, in rare cases, dangerously funky bad breath. Constant ignoring of these damages caused by real life interaction has led us in this our current situation. Our problem constist of three parts: i) the genetic material made from either DNA or RNA, long molecules that carry genetic information; ii) a protein coat that protects these genes; and in some cases iii) an envelope of lipids that surrounds the protein coat when they are outside a cell. Its shape ranges from simple helical andicosahedral forms to more complex structures. And it‘s almost too small to be seen directly with an optical microscope. Now contact lenses that display AR imaging are in development. These bionic contact lenses might contain the elements for display embedded into the lens including integrated circuitry, LEDs and an antenna for wireless communication. Also AR displays can be rendered on devices resembling eyeglasses. Versions include eye wear that employ cameras to intercept the real world view and re-display its augmented view through the eye pieces and devices in which the AR imagery is projected through or reflected off the surfaces of the eye wear lens pieces. Google Glass is not intended for an AR experience, but third-party developers are pushing the device toward a mainstream AR experience. After the debut of Google Glass, many other AR devices, Google Glass alternatives, emerged. Most promising Google Alternatives can be listed as Vuzix M100, Optinvent, Meta Space Glasses, Telepathy, Recon Jet, Glass Up. CrowdOptic, an existing app for smartphones, applies algorithms and triangulation techniques to photo metadata including GPS position, compass heading, and a time stamp to arrive at a relative significance value for photo objects. And CrowdOptic technology can be used by Google Glass users to learn where to look at a given point in time. What else? - There‘s Something Called ‚Sheryl Sandberg Laundry‘ And Men Love It The data shows that when men are more active partners in their marriages, their wives are happier. Happier couples have more sex. So I’ve been telling men all over the country and the world: ‘If you want to have sex with your wife, don’t buy flowers – do laundry.’ A friend of mine told me that she asked her husband to do a load of laundry. - Interactive Plant technology enables precise analogue control of sound and music Botanicus Interacticus is a technology for designing highly expressive interactive plants, both living and artificial. Driven by the rapid fusion of computing and living spaces, we take interaction from computing devices and places it in the physical world using livings plants as an interactive medium. Botanicus Interacticus technology can be used to design highly interactive responsive environments based on plants, developing new forms of organic, living interaction devices as well as creating organic ambient and pervasive interfaces. So gentlemen, that‘s how it is. A rash at the time of shaving is usually a sign of lack of lubrication. And a razor burn an even more common problem, especially among those who shave coarse hairs on areas with sensitive skin like the bikini line, pubic hair, underarms, chest, and beard. Now here‘s what you really need to know: In general a person first becomes contagious two or three days before their symptoms begin, and they remain contagious until all their symptoms have gone. So most people will be contagious for around two weeks. But there are easy steps, which will help to prevent foreseen major spread. Here some examples: Wash you hands regularly and properly, particularly after touching your nose or mouth and before handling food. Clean surfaces regularly to keep them free of germs. Use you own cup, plates, cutlery and kitchen utensils. Use disposable paper towels to dry your hands and face, rather then shared towels. As with tissues, always dispose of the paper towels after you have finished using them. So it‘s a clear choice; either the devil or deep blue sea. What we are looking at is, perhaps, a program on the edge of Life, one that can cross from the symoblic logic of computer software to the murderous logic of international politics. I will not, for the sake of anything better, make declarations which need an attic chorus. But I will certainly not submit to the judgment of destiny without revolting, when it condems the declarant to the saddest isolation. Our current condition requires certain measurements and if you had the guts for that kind of fun you would‘ve done it years ago. So let me tell you one last thing: When the smoke clears, there‘s some cream on top, and that could be your investment return. But it‘s way too early for dessert, Ladies and Gentlemen.

SKYLINE But how does it live, I hear you ask? How does this poor pathetic specimen in there survive? I‘m afraid the sad answer is, „Not very well“. (SUNSET, The Sunday Painter 2013)

Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen. I see you have received the free ticket I sent you. I‘m glad, I did so much want you to be here. You are my guests tonight. Saddest thing first: I doubt that it is possible to reach the few people to whom this letter is no doubt intended, over the heads of you my present comrades. Not because the propositions made in this show may concern them. It will probably even appear to you that such propositions do not concern anyone in particular at all. There are, perhaps, declarations which, for lack of anything better, ridiculously need an Attic chorus, because they suppose, as their effect, in spite of everything, a minimum of astonishment, of misunderstanding, or of repugnance. But one does not address a chorus in order to convince it or rally it, and certainly one does not submit to the judgment of destiny without revolting, when it condemns the declarant to the saddest isolation. This isolation, as far as I am concerned, is moreover in part voluntary, since I would agree to come out of it only on certain hard-to-meet conditions. This show is one of them. What is he talking about? I can see the questions in your face. Confusing, isn‘t it? I know I‘d want to know just what the hell is going on if I were you. Let‘s just say in times like these, it‘s important to keep up appearances. You came to see how a young banker lives in London? But let‘s ask this question together: What is it actually like being a young banker in London? The good thing first: You will have money and you will have a life. Whatever they might tell you in school, the news, your family or business insider; it‘s great to be young and rich. But even after five or more years in banking, a lot of young bankers live in shared housing. This is partly because houses in London are so unaffordable and partly because they’re often in a state of uncertainty about their futures. “Everyone I know was living in shared houses even when they were 28 or 29,” says James, a capital markets banker at a boutique firm in London. “That’s just how it is now – you live with your peers in the industry.” Have a look around. The air ventilation system is for my own comfort, if you should get annoyed by it, the fan controller is looted in the top left corner right next to the bathroom door. The controller has three positions: the bottom position is low speed, the mid position is medium speed and the top position is full speed. Please feel free to adjust it to your own private comfortable zone. But I‘m off course. Let me start again. The reason we love being home is that we get to be surrounded by the things we love. It‘s where you share the story of who you are, it shows off the things you’ve done and the places you’ve been. But obviously, there is a virtual part to it. There are friends, your professional network, news feeds - your entire online environment - which are as much of your reality as your living room furnitures. Without these finishing touches your home wouldn‘t be complete. That‘s why I created Untitled (2013). Untitled brings your living room to life. Constructed as a home device, Untitled is changing the way we stay connected. And each feature was designed to simplify our daily lives. Do you need to order some food, run an Oversea-Meeting, want to watch the news or just spend some time with friends, Untitled is there for you. Thinner and lighter as ever - built in 4mm clear Perspex in the dimensions 120 x 70 x 20 cm - Untitled is the new skinny girl in your flat. It‘s your new live companion. Now why don‘t you make yourself at home. There is beer in the fridge and I even brought my sofa, so you can just sit back in comfort and enjoy Untitled. Even when it‘s not on. Make your life richer, simpler and more fun. Turn on tomorrow now! Because only Skyline is the limit, Ladies and Gentlemen.

SUNSET Ladies and Gentlemen. I see you received the free ticket I sent you. I‘m glad, I did so want you to be here. Good evening. As you can see we came before you, to stand before you. We are tonights entertainment! And we came prepared. We have developed a conceptual framework, which has guided us in our decisions throughout this text and all our show. This framework is much broader than any horizon, it deals with the relationship between thinking and reality. What makes this relationship so complicated is that the thoughts and actions of you, participants, are part of the reality we have to think about. Your thinking thereby serves a dual function: On the one hand you try to understand the world in which you live – that is the cognitive function; on the other, you want to influence the events in which you participate – that is the manipulative function. These two functions interfere with each other – we could call it the interference reflexivity. Reality then ranges from near equilibrium to far from equilibrium conditions and a situation can be considered stable or unstable. But people’s opinion can shift quite quickly. Some of our… crazier guests have crashed the party early, and when I say crazy, I mean REAL psycho. A word of warning here, if anyone sees a dribbling fool barking at the moon or maybe just purring like a kitten, do your civic duty. Walk up to them, put your arm around them and show that you care. We are here together tonight. So please grab a sausage - we brought them for you. A bonfire and great bangers. We had some chocolate banana‘s with it aswell but they must be all gone by now - you might find some frozen one‘s if you lucky. And there‘s beer enough for all of us. It‘s in the dustbin upstairs and we put some ice in to keep it cold. May I ask you to have a look at the objects while traversing there. Although physically unremarkable, the metal hawk posses a very deformed set of values and morals. It‘s a metaphor, do you see that? Have you noticed the same hideously bloated sense of humanity‘s importance in the comic at the wall? Also noted the club footed social conscience and withered optimism? It‘s certainly not for the squeamish, is it? Well, you can‘t make an omelette without breaking some eggs. Did you see the box in the staircase? Antec One, Fractal Design - it‘s a computer. And without questions, computers are more than essential technology today; they have become integral to our lives. They define the functionality and design of our offices, our homes, ourselves. But how does it live, I hear you ask? How does this poor pathetic specimen in there survive? I‘m afraid the sad answer is, „Not very well“. The paintings are Maxes. All up for graps (.de). Pity there is no time to watch all the projection, but it‘s good enough for the atmosphere I guess. We also closed the blinds, curtains drawn, didn‘t know when you will be coming and sunset‘s not always on time. Max wanted to show some footage of his trips, ridiculous stuff, but we‘ll share the link so you can check his travels later. To set the scene: Germany‘s in the driving seat. Max Ruf tours in your heart. But I‘m off course. How to keep the air circulating without the power of fans anyways? Let me start again. Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen. Do you know what triggered World War II? An argument over how many telegraph poles Germany owed its war debt creditors! Isn‘t that hilarious? No? Is it the annoying music? Or you just had a bad day? Am I right? I know I am, I can tell. Why else would you dress up and stick around here? Well here‘s the thing: Answers don‘t give you everlasting satisfaction, sometimes you have to brace yourself for disappointment. Think about it. Imagine your favorite TV show. You‘ve been through it all. The ups, the downs, the crazy coincidences, and then: BANG! They tell you what it‘s all about. Would you be happy? Does it make sense? How come it all ended in a church? You really think it all breaks down into symbolism and structures, concepts and clues? Screw that Batman. Lives depend on us being certain. Reason. Intellect. Skill. This is Social Design. Noting else must matter. Recognizing the mistakes and identifying the misconceptions that have created this current situation is the first step; correcting them is the second. And in any case social phenomena are easier to explain than to predict. Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen.

Notre Dame des Fleurs; Press Release for Emanuel Rohss, „WEY“ @ National Museum Mexico. A Common Cold; Press Release for Stephan Backes, „It‘s way too early for desser“ @ Haydon Boss London. SKYLNE; Press Release for Yves Scherer, „SKYLINE“ @ SSZ Sued Cologne SUNSET; Press Release for „SUNSET“, Max Ruf, Jan Kiefer and Yves Scherer @ The Sunday Painter London.

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